Capital hAyEs

here i go again hope for the best day ever!

so right now at this moment everything i though i could always say would be stable and never change was pulled right from underneath me…………..

i dont know where to say what i really feel and even now i cant…….but i wish i would never let ppl in cause it always suck when the cards you were delt are bad!……

today all i heard was talking to GOD and you know i did and most i ask questions on why he’s doing the more he would………..say nothing why does it feel so empty in my mind?

why cant i make since of all of this …..i want to feel so angry right now but i cant i have peace and its cause me to feel and i hate it!…/………..where to now cause i need to know to whom do i belong …..everyone is exiting either by choice or not………….at least i got away for a few moments thanks what happens in veGas good movie  -cArR!e 

ok so i’m with my buddie kimmie and were watching tom and the big O interview  (this is the new one!)

….and its taking

forever ….they speak so slow and flirting with each other (well not really but there both taking forever ..

and there talking about him and katie’s wedding and other thing’s funny ….man i cant believe that this is going to …like really i’m truely sitting on my couch typing while there talking wow forever there talking about so much really so really that i dont even understand!…… they’ve lost me really i dont know! on on give me a break tom and the big O talk about something better!….

cArR!e

this is a recap of the first interview of the crazies!…

i just got…. back from having coffee with HOLLY B>>……….it was some like AMAZING really it was …. i’m growning up and it’s 80/20 good thing i like it so far hoping that this will continue this move moment and i have to tell you about new olreans but i must go play with kimmie and watch alll dogs go to heaven ohh yeah baby!

cArR!e

funny thing about spring time people start to fall in love!…..well congrats to those who aren’t afraid teach me this will you!….

i wish i could say thats the case in life …… this is on the the most hardest seasons of my life ….

I’m becoming a adult, my parents aren’t and round and my mom is so far from my heart….. i always hate mother’s day ….. i’s always dreaming about my mother and me!

cArR!e

well this is my first blOg ever…… i never really wanted to and i don’t know why i want to now, but whatever ever … i have to get this out of my head and away from my heart, bitter….. is the only remainder after being hurt and exposed far too much……. it’s such a ugly seed nothing good come from it. i get this disease from my mother and i can see first hand what has done to such a beautiful woman she alone and unhappy most of the time and when love and peace and joy comes around it is consumed, her bitterness it has eaten her heart alive. sometimes i wonder if she want to forgive anymore……. i don’t want this to be my fate …oh some of the things that your parent give…… you some good, others a ticking time bomb waiting for the right moment……….. i feel that I’ve spent so much time trying you understand other people that i don’t think they really understand me …..i feel right now that i”m on edge because of the box i put my self in, and heaven forbid that i speak openly from my heart, i don’t really think i can, I’m afraid bitterness will just come out…. how can i be gentle …… what I’m felling right now isn’t gentle……. here’s what i don’t get: people think that just because i don’t where my heart on my sleeve, i don’t have emotions or that i can’t give mercy….. what a non sleeve heart wearing girl to doo? so I’m stuck and I’m tired of walking on tip toes and with some people thinking that they know me when they don’t……it leaves me feeling like it a waste of time for my to understand them if i just get placed in a box!……. so what now ….

Doc i need your help…

cArR!E

I would like to invite you to my world at time it may seem dark, confusing and alittle fuzzy ….. so here it goes…

cArR!e