well this is my first blOg ever…… i never really wanted to and i don’t know why i want to now, but whatever ever … i have to get this out of my head and away from my heart, bitter….. is the only remainder after being hurt and exposed far too much……. it’s such a ugly seed nothing good come from it. i get this disease from my mother and i can see first hand what has done to such a beautiful woman she alone and unhappy most of the time and when love and peace and joy comes around it is consumed, her bitterness it has eaten her heart alive. sometimes i wonder if she want to forgive anymore……. i don’t want this to be my fate …oh some of the things that your parent give…… you some good, others a ticking time bomb waiting for the right moment……….. i feel that I’ve spent so much time trying you understand other people that i don’t think they really understand me …..i feel right now that i”m on edge because of the box i put my self in, and heaven forbid that i speak openly from my heart, i don’t really think i can, I’m afraid bitterness will just come out…. how can i be gentle …… what I’m felling right now isn’t gentle……. here’s what i don’t get: people think that just because i don’t where my heart on my sleeve, i don’t have emotions or that i can’t give mercy….. what a non sleeve heart wearing girl to doo? so I’m stuck and I’m tired of walking on tip toes and with some people thinking that they know me when they don’t……it leaves me feeling like it a waste of time for my to understand them if i just get placed in a box!……. so what now ….
Doc i need your help… 
cArR!E
